French Onion hackers

Apparently some asshole thought it would be a fun idea to hack my email and in doing so, send my life into a spiraling mess that was recovered in a day.
A regrettable calamity and absolutely pathetic attempt at trying to disassemble my business. My apologies though, to anyone who received a suspicious email due to my lack of creativity when it comes to passwords (surprising, no?).

One questions how the time to profits ratio works out for those who hack personal emails. Furthermore, what a fascinating line of work to try explaining to those you meet. I find it hard enough describing my job and have begun settling with “it’s an office job where I sit in a cubicle”...I wonder if they inhabit the same response. I bet hacking personal emails has some real perks. You can probably do your job naked or drunk and get to choose your own hours. I doubt there’s a lot of money in it but I also doubt that there are any taxes taken out of their wages. I could never be an email hacker because I’d spend all my time and money buying shoes online that I’ll never have a reason to wear.

Thinking of it though, the only place I wear irresistibly adorable shoes that I spend hard-earned money on is at work. Damnit, now I’m depressed and it’s all this mysterious hackers fault. If I find him, I’m going to put one of my zebra print, peep toe heels up his ass and find some irrational reason to tell him that it’s his own fault. Because THAT’S what I’m good at.

The other thing I’m good at: making French Onion Soup that tastes better than my Dad’s (even though I haven’t tasted his).

Ingredients:
½ C unsalted butter
4 onions, sliced
2 cloves garlic, chopped
4 bay leaves
3 fresh thyme sprigs
1 C red wine (about ½ bottle)
3 heaping Tblsp. All-purpose flour
2 Q beef broth
Salt
Pepper

Melt butter in a large pot over medium heat. Add onions, garlic, bay leaves, thyme, salt & pepper. Cook until onions are soft and caramelized (about 25 minutes).
Add wine, bring to a boil then reduce heat and simmer until wine has evaporated and onions are dry (about 5-10 minutes)
Discard bay leaves and thyme sprigs. Dust onions with flour and stir. Turn head down to med-low and cook 10 minutes (to get the flour flavor out).
Add beef broth and bring back to a simmer, cook for at least 10 minutes (I tend to let mine simmer for 30-40 minutes to ensure all the flavors are blended). Season with salt and pepper.

Obviously, being French Onion soup, this is traditionally served with Gruyere or Swiss cheese and croutons although, I sort of like mine as it is and don’t bother with the fuss of ladling it into a bowl so I can melt cheese on top. To each his own though.

Now, I'm going back to SLC for a few days over Thanksgiving this year. I suggest a taste-testing of Dad's F.O. vs. mine. We'll need ballots.